What is Going On Around Here?

I scratched my cornea with my contact the other day. I am the kind of person who believes that I am a weakling and a whiner, so I would not give in to the high amount of discomfort that I felt when inserting my left contact on Thursday morning. As I toughed my way through the day, adjusting and readjusting my contact, I did a real number on myself.

The doctor was able to see it with the dye and the funky light. He described it as a small but deep cut on the center of my cornea. (The attached graphic is not picture of my eye, but I think it is pretty dramatic so I'm using it.)

I had been a "big, brave, dog" until then but I absolutely melted down upon hearing the news. As I sat crying into my Honey's shoulder, my main concern was not the damage to my eye. (Well, not directly.) It was with the possibility that I might never be able to wear my contacts again.

You see this year I have become extremely vain. My glasses easily add ten years to my face, and I can't handle that. So my contacts are a Godsend and a real boost to my self confidence.

No one ever said that knowing I was forty would affect me so much. I always thought age was just a number, but I am constantly having to fight stereotypes of what is proper for a woman my age. What is that all about and when did that start? And why can't I make it stop?

I look great most of the time, especially when I have my contacts in. My Honey is 10 years younger than I am. I am progressive, adventurous, and fun. So how did I end up worried about being so old?